


Periphery of Memory

by Kaleidoscope_Carousel



Category: Once Upon A Time - Fandom
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-20
Updated: 2013-01-20
Packaged: 2018-01-12 19:11:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1196280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaleidoscope_Carousel/pseuds/Kaleidoscope_Carousel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ruby comes to keep Belle company in the hospital, when even Rumple's kiss can't bring her back. <i>As always, any constructive criticism is appreciated</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	Periphery of Memory

**Author's Note:**

> This was written back in January of 2013, so is non-canon compliant for any episodes aired after that.

  
There was some sort of commotion outside her hospital room. Someone was screaming and shouting, it sounded like a woman. The orderlies and some of the burlier male RN’s were running to try and help out in any way possible. All she could hear was the crashing of surgical instruments, grunts, and that screaming as the hospital staff tried to gain control of the situation.

She shifted in her bed to try and see what was going on, and caught a glimpse of a distraught woman, dark brown hair wild, and eyes. . . she could have sworn those eyes were glowing yellow, flailing as she was picked up by two orderlies. The woman managed to free one of her arms and stretched it out towards the glass. “Belle! No! For the gods’ sake no!” The woman’s voice was hoarse, torn from sobbing and screaming. “Put me down, I have to see her. Belle! Belle, it’s me, oh gods. No!” A third man joined the other two and managed to pin the woman’s limbs by her sides, then a fourth grabbed her legs, and the four men together were able to carry the distraught woman out of sight.

Briefly she wondered who this “Belle” person was, that she could create such a reaction from the woman, and, she supposed the intimidating man on the side of the road the night she was found. He frightened her, in some strange way. She was still quite weak from the blood loss, and tired from the commotion, so she rolled back over and closed her eyes.

Her dreams were strange, fractured. Images flickered and flared behind her eyelids. _Flames, flames, a beast, and an embossed sun. Strange characters in a leather bound book, and a woman with a veil made of chain mail. Another woman with dark, sad eyes, but haughty and aloof. Dangerous. Then nothing but scratches in a stone wall marking off days. Twisting and dancing and melting together until they formed a new prison with pillowed walls. Her room in the asylum._ She whimpered, flailed in her sleep. . . _and the walls melted and solidified into the padded booth in some sort of restaurant. A diner. And there was a girl in red, although she could not focus on the girl’s face. She knew the girl was smiling, though. Smiling and handing her a rose. . .no, it was a glass of something. Something cold that smelled slightly of lemon, and then the girl was leaning in, pressing a kiss to her lips._ No, this was wrong. The kiss felt wrong. The lips too thin, scratchy, this was not her girl. What was. . .

She woke up, screaming. “No, get away from me! What are you doing? Get out!” She was panicking, couldn’t move. The wires and tubes held her down like chains, felt like worms under her skin, as she crawled back as far up the bed as she could go.

“Belle, Belle it’s me, it’s Rumple! Don’t you remember?” It was the man from last night. His greasy hair hung down by his face, his eyes and face haggard, as if he hadn’t slept. He looked shrunken as he faced down her reaction, but still he terrified her.

“No, I don’t know you!” She spat. “How dare you come in here and. . . and kiss me!” She ran a hand across her lips, to try and wipe the taste of him away, the feel of his stubble against her face. “Doctor! Nurse! Someone, get him out of here. Whoever you are, just, please, go.” He opened his mouth to protest, deny, say anything, but closed it again and turned to walk out just as Dr Whale ran in.  
“Mr Gold. . “ he began.

“Don’t bother with the speech. I’m already on my way out.” The man leaned heavily on his cane as he limped out of her room, shoulders hunched up around his ears.

“I’m sorry, miss. He’s gone now, and I’ll try to make sure he doesn’t bother you again.”

“See that you do.” The words felt strange coming out of her mouth. Like it was her, but not her. Her accent, her intonation, but not her manner of speech. Briefly, she wondered if she oughtn’t be back in that padded room, then shook the thought away.

“Do you need anything else, while I’m here? Something to help you sleep?” The doctor asked her.

“No, thank you. As long as he stays out, I think I’ll be just fine.”

“Alright, then. Buzz the nurses if you need anything.” She waited until Whale walked out before closing her eyes again and drifting back to sleep. This time when she blacked out, there were no dreams.

She woke up to the unfamiliar sound of hospital machinery beeping, and nurses running here and there through the halls. It took her a moment to realise there was a person sleeping in the chair next to her bed. As soon as she moved, though, the occupant stirred and sat up.

“You’re awake,” the woman said, words half mangled by the yawn she only barely managed to cover.

“Yes, I am. Who are you?” She asked. A flash of grief passed over the woman’s face, although she quickly schooled her expression into a smile.

“I’m Ruby. I’m. . .I was, a friend.” That name, Ruby. . . _a quick friendly smile, the first in years and. . .blindness. Panic, a. . . a mine cart? The man, no, leaving, pancakes with sticky golden. . . full moon, terror. No they’ll kill you! Chains and books and. . ._ She shook her head to rid herself of the images. The woman, Ruby, had placed a warm hand over her own.

“Belle, hey, are you okay?” She asked urgently.

“Why does everyone keep calling me that? My name’s not Belle. I don’t know who you think I am, but I’m not her.” That’s when she recognised the woman, although today her eyes seemed to be a beautiful, but otherwise completely ordinary, shade of green. She’d been the one screaming in the hallway, the one who had to be taken away by four large men, and even then she’d put up a good fight.

She drew her hand away from Ruby’s, anxiously, although as soon as she did she missed the warmth and contact. Ruby placed her own hands back into her lap, eyes as sad as a kicked puppy’s. She felt sorry for pulling away, but she barely knew this woman, if Ruby were telling the truth, she certainly wouldn’t know. Although, something told her that Ruby was trustworthy. Maybe it was the openness of her eyes and her face. She looked as if she couldn’t hide anything. Not like the man with his hooded eyes, and his secrets, all those secrets, sitting at the wheel spinning, spinning. _Why do you spin so much? To forget. Forget_ What? Where did that come from?

“Sorry about that. Let's start over. What is your name?” Ruby asked, trying to smooth over whatever rift she’d created.

“My name is May. May Lee.” Ruby stuck her hand out towards May.

“Nice to make your acquaintance, May. Ruby Lucas at your service.” Ruby looked so earnest, that May couldn’t help take her hand. It was nice to feel Ruby’s touch again, although the other woman shook once, and then loosed her grip. “So I should probably go. I. . .well I really just wanted to make sure you were okay. I hope that’s alright, even though,” she stopped and swallowed a few times before continuing, “even though you won’t remember me.” May thought about the first time she’d seen Ruby, frantic and screaming for this Belle that everyone apparently thought she was. She must have been someone very special. May didn’t mind being thought of as special, at least not by Ruby.

“Of course it’s alright. And, I wouldn’t mind if you came back to visit again.” Ruby smiled, a real bright smile this time and _the syrup is for the pancakes, but I like when it gets on everything. . .a girl in trouble. . .girl’s night. . .wine and cheese. . .notbecauseyou’reamouse. Thank you._ May’s fractured thoughts echoed in her head and she had to concentrate to bring herself back to the hospital room and the here and now. "Sorry, did you just say something?"

“Oh, I just said thank you. I will, I’ll come by later after work. Maybe bring you some edible food, instead of the hospital crap, and a book or something. I know you. . .” Ruby stopped short. Shrugged. “Well, you used to love books.” May smiled.

“That would be very nice, Ruby, thank you. I’ll see you later today, then?”

“Absolutely! I’ll see you soon.” Ruby practically bounced out of the room, and May had to squeeze her eyes shut to block out the thought of Ruby wagging her tail. Maybe she really, really did belong in that room downstairs, although she hated thinking that way.

The day simply dragged once Ruby left. The nurses came in and checked on her wound, adjusted her bed, brought lunch. Dr Whale came by to assess her, and she slipped in and out of sleep, because there was nothing else to do. When she woke up from one of her naps, she realised the hand she’d been holding in her dream _brushing her hand across the girl's stomach around her waist, butterflies. We’ve got plans,_ was real and solid. Ruby was back in her chair (how quickly it had become Ruby’s chair), four books piled in her lap, and a cardboard takeout container with cup of something standing on the table next to her.

“You sure do a lot of sleeping.” Ruby remarked when May’s eyes opened.

“Well, so would you if you were recovering from a gunshot wound and there was absolutely nothing else to do.” May shot back. Ruby gave her a lopsided grin.

“I guess you’ve got a point. Anyway, I brought you a burger and some fries, a drink, and hopefully enough reading material to last you a day or two.” May propped herself up in her bed.

“Oh good! I’m starved. For both sustenance and entertainment.” Ruby wheeled the hospital table over to May’s bed and adjusted the height so she could eat comfortably.

“I wasn’t sure how you liked your fries, so I bought packets of ketchup, and some salt and vinegar.

“I’m not really a huge fan of ketchup, so I’ll take the vinegar, thanks.” Ruby tore open the little plastic packets and let May pour it over her fries. They were a bit soggy, and the burger was quickly cooling, but it was delicious anyway, and May devoured it.

“Glad to see you’re enjoying that. Granny really does make the best burgers in town.” May could see that Ruby was desperately trying to hold in a grin at the speed May was eating, but the corners of her lips quirked up without permission.

“Who?”

“Granny. My grandma. She, uh, she owns and operates the motel and diner in town and I’m assistant manager. That’s where we met for the first time. I offered-“ _to call you a cab. I’ve never had it iced before. Hands around her mouth. . . a strange man. Father!_ “May, hey May are you alright? You disappeared for a second there. Were. . .you weren’t remembering were you?” Ruby’s eyes were keen, focussed, she reached out to touch May, drew back.

“Yeah,” May answered, putting the remnants of her burger down. “Yeah, I’m fine. I. . .I don’t know. It might have been a memory but I’m not sure.” This time it was she who reached for Ruby’s hand, squeezed once, twice. “Would you mind maybe coming back tomorrow? I’m just a little tired.” Ruby was getting better at controlling her expression, but May still say the rapid blinking, the downturn of the lips, the hurt glance that was quickly pushed away.

“Of course. Yeah, no problem. I’ll just. . .I’ll just leave these here, then?” Ruby said, hoisting the books up.

“Yes, thank you.” Ruby placed them carefully near the remains of May’s meal, and padded softly out of the room. May felt her stomach twist, and she took a sip of her drink to distract herself. Iced tea. _I’ve never had it iced before._ Confused, she pushed it away.

Ruby stayed away until late the next afternoon. When she did finally show up she had a restless energy about her, although she looked exhausted.

“Are you okay?” May asked. Ruby laughed.

“I thought that was supposed to be my line?”

“Well, apparently I’ve stolen it.” Said May. Ruby pretended to be affronted.

“How dare you, and here I am bearing cards!” True to her word, Ruby drew the deck from the pocket of her jeans. “I wasn’t sure if you were bored with reading. I thought this might be fun. Maybe a little Go Fish, or Texas Hold’Em. You know, the classics.” May giggled, and Ruby perked right up at the sound.

“Sure, that sounds fun. But seriously, though, are you alright?” Ruby gave a one-shouldered shrug in response to the question.

“Yeah. Fine. I was just busy last night. I had some running around to do.” She laughed at this, as if from some private joke. _Full moon, cursed. . .I did this I’m a monster, I believe in you. . . expert in rehabilitation._ “So?” She said, taking in a deep breath. “What’s it going to be?”

“How about five-card rummy?”

“I don’t think I know that one. But why don’t you teach me?” Ruby asked, gently.

“I’d be happy to.”

They played a few games of rummy, until May got tired of Ruby beating her. “Beginner’s luck.” She muttered. Ruby only smirked. In consolation, she offered to read to May, and the two of them sat companionably, Ruby reading and May, eyes closed, listening intently, until dark.

Ruby stopped mid-sentence, and May opened her eyes to protest when she saw the anxiety radiating from her friend’s (and she could really call her a friend now) face. “I’m sorry, May,” Ruby said, “but I really really have to go. See you tomorrow?”

“Yeah, sure.” It was May’s turn to be disappointed. “See you tomorrow.” Ruby grabbed May’s hand and squeezed it gently, once, twice, their secret little code. She looked back regretfully at May lying on the bed, but swiftly gathered up her coat and practically ran out of the room.

May couldn’t sleep well that night. She lay tossing and turning for hours on her hospital bed. By midnight she was so frustrated that she felt she would never be able to fall asleep. That’s when she heard what she could have sworn was a wolf howling outside, near the window to her room. Instead of feeling afraid, though, the sound calmed her and the mournful wail accompanied her all the way into her slumber. When she dreamed she dreamed of a wolf, a wolf with Ruby's eyes, baying out her sorrows to the full moon.

The next morning the nurses deemed her well enough for a short walk through the hospital, but not out on the grounds just yet. She took small hesitant steps, the pain from where the bullet ripped through her still throbbed. She ducked in to the gift store, just to break the monotony of institutional hospital walls, patients, and staff. It was quite small, smaller than the room she was currently living in, and mostly stocked with stuffed animals, flowers, and “get-well” balloons. Up near the counter, however, was a small selection of jewelry. May felt herself drawn to it, and rifled through the various bracelets and charms, until her fingers fell across a sterling silver pendant in the shape of a howling wolf. She thought of her dream last night, of the howling heard outside her window, and shuffled back as quickly as she could to her room to call a nurse.

“Did I have any money on me, when I was brought in?” She asked, once the nurse arrived.

“Uh, yeah, I think so.” He said. “Just let me go grab your personal effects.” He was back shortly with the outfit May had been found in, minus the blouse which was beyond saving. She dug around in the pockets of the skirt and withdrew a small wallet. There was no id, but there was a crumpled twenty dollar bill. May hobbled back to the shop as quickly as her energy level and injury would allow, and bought the wolf pendant. She wasn’t sure why it was so important to her; she just felt that it was.

She hung it on the side of the bed so that the sterling silver wolf caught the light, and waited.

Ruby didn’t show up for several days, and May was starting to worry about her friend, in between worrying about herself. Dr Whale had come and pronounced her healthy enough to leave the hospital, but she had no family, no living space, no memory except for her time spent in psychiatric care. She did recall that Ruby had mentioned her grandmother owning and operating a motel. If she had no other recourse, May figured, that was where she would go.

She was just shrugging on her cardigan, when Ruby limped in. She had a livid yellow bruise on one cheek, and a scrape above her eyebrow. Her left leg was also obviously injured, she was favouring it heavily. May gasped.

“What happened to you? Ruby? Oh my goodness! Are you alright?”

Ruby still managed to throw her that same cheeky grin. “Still stealing my lines, I see. I’m fine. How about you? You running away before I could come back in to pick up those books?”

“Of course not, and don’t turn this into some sort of joke. I won’t have it.” May stepped in close, and gingerly traced the outline of Ruby’s facial injuries, pulling back when Ruby flinched slightly. Ruby grabbed May’s hand and guided it down to her side.

“Don’t. I’m alright, seriously. Someone just wanted to send me a message. But I promise, I don’t intimidate easily.” May noticed Ruby hadn’t let go of her hand. Suddenly, she didn’t want her to. May never wanted Ruby to let her go.

“Ruby, I. . .I’m going to do something and I really hope it’s okay. . .” she whispered as she grabbed Ruby by her shoulders to pull her down so she could reach her lips. Ruby gave in easily and as their lips touched in a gentle kiss May felt a surge of energy rush through them. It lifted her hair, and tingled against her skin. It sparked and danced inside her and suddenly she was hit by image after image of her previous life. _Father and the castle, her childhood, Gaston, and Rumple come to take her away, Mulan, the Yaoguai and Philip. The Queen! Prison of one sort exchanged for a prison of another, being set free, Rumple again, the fight, the diner, Ruby! Ruby helping her giving her a home, being her pillar in the strange world of Storybrooke. The Pirate! And the gunshot, crossing the line. The Hospital, Rumple, then Ruby again screaming for her and_ “Oh!” Belle stumbled back. Ruby’s hands were at her elbows, holding her upright. She looked up into those piercing green eyes. “Ruby,” she whispered, “I’m back. It’s me, it’s Belle.”

“Belle, oh thank goodness!” Belle surged forward again, pressed her lips against Ruby’s, only breaking the kiss to murmur against her mouth.

“You did it, you broke the curse.” And then softer, “True love’s kiss.” She pulled away, blushing, hands in pockets where her fingers curled around the pendant she’d bought only a few days (a lifetime) prior. “I. . .” suddenly shy she drew her hand out of her pocket slowly, “I bought you this. When I was May, I mean.” Ruby accepted the necklace with reverence.

“It’s beautiful, Belle, thank you.” She clasped it around her neck, and let it fall against her chest where it hung there, shining in the unforgiving light of the hospital’s fluorescent bulbs.

“You’re welcome. I heard you, you know. The other night. I mean, I didn’t know it was you, but I heard you out there, howling. It was comforting.” She missed contact with Ruby, and pulled her into a hug. “I missed you,” she said, against Ruby’s chest, “even when I didn’t know it was you. Somehow I knew.”

“I missed you too.” Ruby breathed. Belle stepped back slightly to look up at her friend (no, at her love, her love).

“But what did happen to you? You’re hurt. It wasn’t. . .did Rumple do this to you?” She didn’t need an answer, the look in Ruby’s eyes, the way she averted her gaze told her everything. “Tell me.” She said, stern.

“Yes. He met me at the doors of the hospital the other day as I was coming in to see you. He said if he couldn’t see you, no one should. He tried to make me promise, and when I wouldn’t, well, he used his cane as incentive. But I couldn’t stay away. I could never stay away.” Belle felt a tear roll down her cheek.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. It’s not your fault,” Ruby said, wiping the tear away with the pad of her thumb. “He’s gone now, anyway. He and Emma and Henry left this morning to look for his son. I’ll be fine. I’m not afraid.”

“And I won’t let him touch you, not ever again!” Belle said, her voice steely. “You saved me when he couldn’t. And now I’m going to save you.” Ruby smiled, her eyes soft.

“Thank you.” She whispered.

“No,” Belle said, “thank you. Not just for this, but for everything.” They stared at each other for a moment before Ruby gathered Belle into her arms again. Belle sighed into the embrace. She finally felt as if she’d truly come home.


End file.
